1 day ago2 minDuckholed: A Ductionary DefinitionDucks and Chucks, Bear with me, friends, as I do my ducking best to define the term duckholed without losing my salmon. You see, just...
Jun 192 minRubber Ducky Devastation at the Save-A-Swan Charity GalaDucks and chucks, Today, I'm going to tell you a story about my best frenemy Sir Mallard Jones. You see, good old Sir Mallard has one or...
May 112 minMallardacious: A Ductionary Definition (And Devastating Confession)Ducks and Chucks, I warn you, friends, this isn't just a ductionary definition. Sadly, it is also a devastating duck-confession. Many of...
Feb 171 minMy Pondweed Fritters Aren't Yours, Mallard JonesDear Mallard, Now, I know we're best frenemies, but when I leave a trio of delicious, deep-fried pondweed fritters on a plate on the...
Jan 313 minBlowing Snow: A Duck and Mallard Jones DramaDucks and Chucks, It's me, Duck T, your humble, snow-fearing, managerial bird. Yes, that's right, we're expecting DUCKING SNOW. And you...
Jan 205 minStrange and Suspicious Happenings at Mallard CastleDucks and Chucks, The other night, yours truly ended up standing in a pile of 278 rubber duckies. What a duck-head! Allow me to explain:...
Aug 17, 20212 minSir Mallard Jones Marries the Johnson-Johnsons in StyleDucks and Chucks, Yes, Mallard Jones, my best frenemy, married two members of my chosen family this weekend—the Johnson-Johnsons. And...
Aug 12, 20212 minScandal: How Mallard Jones Ducked Up Shakesbeak's Duckbeth, Live On StageDucks and Chucks, As some of you already know, our amateur production of Shakesbeak's Duckbeth recently hit the pond. And yes, yours...
Jul 2, 20213 minLow Self-Esteem? These Duck and Human Experts Help You to Know You're Super-Ducking Awesome! Ducks and Chucks, When was the last time anyone told you, "You're super-ducking awesome!"? Well, I, your regular pond-managing duck, am...
Jun 2, 20213 min"Floating To the Loo": Sir Mallard Jones On His Latest Me-Preneur InventionsDucks and Chucks, I had always assumed that Sir Mallard Jones, my best frenemy, just quacked around in his castle all day, not really...
May 21, 20214 minPeacoquetterie, Poppyduckers, and Other Types of Bird SlangDucks and Chucks, Just the other day, yours truly was at the Pondweed Store searching for a giftable box of pondweed crackers, when I...
May 13, 20213 minIn Thunder, Lightning, or Ducker's DoopermarketDucks and Clucks, Great news! I, your humble duck, am getting dramatic! After two grueling auditions, I have been cast as First...
Apr 23, 20213 minSir Mallard Jones and the Great Mirror-Ball/Frosting Accident of 2021 Ducks and Chucks, this is a guest post by my best frenemy Sir Mallard Jones, who is shamelessly plugging my new book, The Ballad of Sir...
Apr 14, 20212 minDuck Theft! Some Beak-Brain Has Been Flipper-Tucking Our StuffDucks and Chucks, My friends, the worst has happened. We have a pond thief. But I don't mean someone's gone and stolen the actual pond....
Mar 26, 20213 minWhy Do Ducks Apply To Oxford If They're Not Allowed In? An Interview With Sir Mallard Jones.Duck and Chucks, I, your trusty duck blogger, am here with my frenemy Sir Mallard Jones. Why? Because Mallard wants to talk about the...