Duck and Riley Adjust To Life With Their Humans



Ducks and Chucks,


I could not believe it the other day when Star was confused about my sleeping in their wheelchair.


Okay, let's back up a little. Riley and I have started living almost exclusively with Star and Other Duck. Our apartment, which is much smaller and lower than theirs, is always there when we need it. But during the dark days of this ducking pondemic, we often prefer to lodge with our humans instead.


Problems with this set-up:


1. We have to pop up to our apartment to go to the loo, because last time we used Star and Other Duck's bathroom, I ended up falling into the toilet bowl, which had just been freshly cleaned with some kind of blue goop. This left a mark on my duck-butt that was the shape of South Africa—which, as duck would have it, is my partner Riley's favorite place, which is why they wouldn't let me wash it off until later that day. The mark was sticky and also smelled strange, like the stuff Mallard Jones uses to wax his head-feathers.


2. There is a ducking washing machine in the basement! Like many plushies/real ducks, I have a deep fear of washing machines—especially the spin cycle. And you know what? It wouldn't matter so much if it weren't for the sound. It sounds like a duckling crying out because they've woken up on the back of an elephant. The noise resonates up into our apartment, because Star and Other Duck live in a place that has very thin floors.


It's super-ducking triggering. But duck-EFT has helped.


Positives with this set-up:


1. We get to sleep on the comfiest couch in the world, which even has a me-decorated cushion on it, which you can check out below. (I used to hate me-decorated products, but after some great therapy, I learned to love them.) It's so amazing that Riley's even talking about getting a bird-sized one for our bedroom. Not that we're in there much these days, but having a thing can make you feel awesomely duckly.


An image of Duck giving the flipper is all over a decorated cushion.

2. I get to manage the pond virtually from that comfy couch. Because yes, since we birds have a ducking pondemic of our own, I am now managing the pond from home (in my pajamas). This mostly involves my co-birds attempting to paddle around their living rooms, which is a bit of a fiasco, especially when they break their own lamps. But it keeps us birding, and that's what being a bird is all about.


3. Also, living with Star and Other Duck makes Star happy, as you can see from their little story below, in which Riley and I star:



Ducks and chucks, I hope that you have somewhere safe and warm to be, during these tough times. Because my other favorite place to me, of course, is here with you, sharing my ducking outrageous stories.


Thank you for being there, friends.


Loves ya,

Duck