1 day ago2 minDuckholed: A Ductionary DefinitionDucks and Chucks, Bear with me, friends, as I do my ducking best to define the term duckholed without losing my salmon. You see, just...
Jun 162 minDuctionary Definition: Beak-To-FlippersDucks and Chucks, Yes, dear friends, it's me, Duck T, and I am abso-ducking-lutely delighted to be defining the duck-phrase...
May 272 minDuckloads: A Ductionary Definition Ducks and Chucks, What can I say? This duck loves carrots. I don't love carrots as much as pondweed, which is totally my favorite-ever...
May 112 minMallardacious: A Ductionary Definition (And Devastating Confession)Ducks and Chucks, I warn you, friends, this isn't just a ductionary definition. Sadly, it is also a devastating duck-confession. Many of...
Apr 292 minQuackduckery: Ductionary DefinitionDucks and Chucks, Quackduckery, my friends, is a ducking bad thing. It's when a duck is quack-driven, instead of duck-driven. The duck in...
Apr 242 minBeak-Holes (Ductionary Definition)The truth is, every bird has beak-holes, which is why the pond gets so noisy at night. (I prefer to go home and sleep with Riley. They do…
Feb 171 minMy Pondweed Fritters Aren't Yours, Mallard JonesDear Mallard, Now, I know we're best frenemies, but when I leave a trio of delicious, deep-fried pondweed fritters on a plate on the...
Jan 205 minStrange and Suspicious Happenings at Mallard CastleDucks and Chucks, The other night, yours truly ended up standing in a pile of 278 rubber duckies. What a duck-head! Allow me to explain:...
Dec 1, 20213 minWhy Duck T Is Definitely Not A Baby-ToyDucks and Chucks, Yours truly is irritated from beak-to-flippers! Why? Because Star told me just this morning that when they originally...
Nov 19, 20212 minA Duck In Your Shower? A Duck On Your Chest? Duck T Does Not Approve of His Own Products.Ducks and Chucks, Help! Really! This is ducking bad! My image has been put all over various Redbubble products. Yes, I consented to this...
Nov 12, 20213 minDuck's Been Put On Beak-Hole Checking Duty. And He's Created Some Specialist Gear. [*Clears Throat*]Ducks and Chucks, Okay, so I've been put on beak-filter checking duty at the pond. This means that while the pondemic continues, yours...
Nov 5, 20213 minFive Reasons Why Duck Is Freaked Out By SantaDucks and Chucks, Santa Claus is ducking scary! And I hate to say it, but we birds seem to suddenly be interested this intimidating,...
Oct 25, 20213 minFor Duck's Sake, Please Stop Gendering Mallard's Snail!Guest post by Sir Mallard Jones: Dear Gendered Ducks and Humans, It is I, Sir Mallard Jones, Duck's best frenemy. I'm truly grateful that...
Oct 4, 20213 minHow Duck Dealt With The Twins From "The Shining" Ducks and Chucks, Now, look. Who on earth are these ducking twins and why are they so insistent about playing with me? At first, it was...
Sep 24, 20214 minThree Simple Ways Of Being A Duck-Darn Superhero Ducks and chucks, The other day, yours truly, a humble duck, went to work in my superhero costume. Why the uniform, you ask? Because I...
Sep 16, 20212 minDuck Shares His Apology To Lauren Bacall For His Forbidden Fling With BogartDucks and Chucks, So, thanks to Star, the truth is out on Instagram. [Sorry, Duck!—Star] Yes, I once gave the flipper to Lauren Bacall in...
Sep 8, 20213 minThree Duck-Approved Self-Love Tips From Dr. Nicole LePera, The Holistic Psychologist Ducks and Chucks, There's no denying it. Dr. Nicole LePera, aka The Holistic Psychologist on Instagram, knows how to help this duck to...
Sep 3, 20212 minRudyard Kipling's IF—Duck VersionDucks and Chucks, It's your ever-honest duck, quacking a stately hello! And today, I bring you duck lyrics. (By the way, if you missed...
Aug 17, 20212 minSir Mallard Jones Marries the Johnson-Johnsons in StyleDucks and Chucks, Yes, Mallard Jones, my best frenemy, married two members of my chosen family this weekend—the Johnson-Johnsons. And...
Aug 3, 20213 minFive Imaginative Ways In Which Ducks Are Giving Misogyny The FlipperDucks and chucks, Well, my feathered friends, this duck is proud! I am happy to say that across the ducking world, ducks are giving...